• About
  • Contact Tanara

Tanara McCauley

~ Love Knows Color

Tanara McCauley

Tag Archives: family

The Cookie Jar

07 Wednesday Oct 2015

Posted by tanaramccauley in Faith, Relationships, and Other Topics

≈ 10 Comments

Tags

academics, achievement, amreading, amwriting, author, baking, books, calling, children, Christ, college, cookies, faith, family, galletas, Mom, parenting, passion, priorities, purpose, pursuit, relationships, student, success, writer


“A cookie jar, though beautiful, will always disappoint if found empty.”

My cookie jar is empty.

It’s seen a batch or two–maybe–in the months since I returned home from Mount Hermon’s Christian Writers Conference; but for the most part it’s been unoccupied. Relieved of duty. Free of tenants.

And for a while I blamed my husband.

See, we had a plan. As you probably know from a previous post, my youngest daughter started kindergarten this year, freeing up my afternoons. And according to the plan I would take the first year to write full time with keys blazing and submissions flying.

But somehow in my short, five-day conference absence the plan changed. Just up and flew away somewhere. Out there. Over the rainbow. And in its place: “You need to finish your degree.”

Say wha?

My arguments against this new scheme raged vehement. Very artistic and author-ish too. Something about sensible suits and academic labels, the futility of human standards of achievement, the colors of my creative mind fading…you get the picture. When that failed I took the practical financial approach.

Nothing worked. God has a new plan, saith my husband, and a degree for the missus therein lies.

Well alrighty then, Misters.

That was six months ago. I saw evidence of God’s hand in the orchestration, including a ripple effect in other areas. Then I discovered I could finish much earlier than expected. I snatched that baton and sprinted off with it. On top of that aim I added honor student. And because a writer must always be reading and writing I made sure to check those boxes too. Super productive. No time for baking cookies.

I felt very much like degree people feel. Accomplished. Potentially important. But in what way? And to whom?

The answers came when my son returned home one night from Awana with a list of two things he wanted to do better. One of them read:

Leave Mommy alone when she’s doing homework.

SLAYED.

Reading those words made me consider how many times I’ve said them in the past six months, and how many times I haven’t played Terraria with my son, or done Zumba with the girls, or watched My Little Pony, or baked the weekend’s cookies; all because I’d immersed myself in God’s plan–stretching it into something self-serving–instead of remaining immersed in God who keeps my priorities straight.

My kids are awesome little people. I’m proud of them. And if I graduated summa cum laude and became a bestselling author whose books hit the big screen they’d be proud of me too. And all of it would be a pretty package to behold.

But if the intimacy is not there, if I don’t remain a present, attentive mother who knows them and is known by them–who keeps school and writing and whatever else comes up out of family time–then what we’re headed for is no better than an empty cookie jar.

And that will never be a part of God’s plan.

My jar is still empty, but now it’s only because the cookies are cooling.

Your turn: Have you ever found yourself running ahead (or away) from what God’s doing in your life?

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...

Kids Cook Fridays

22 Friday May 2015

Posted by tanaramccauley in Faith, Relationships, and Other Topics

≈ 9 Comments

Tags

chef, children, cookbooks, cooking, culinary, dinner, family, friday, parenting, recipes, ree drummond, relationships, TGIF, weekend plans

Fridays have always been a population favorite. They end the work and school week, usher in vacations (or holidays, for my European friends), and offer much-needed breaks. Even the most disagreeable chime in on the popular consensus of Friday’s arrival…ahh.

In my home, we issue up a hearty “Mmmm” as well. Because that’s when the kids get to cook.

062

And I’m not talking peanut butter sandwiches or ramen noodles either. During the week, they pick a recipe based on what we have on hand, get a $20 budget for any missing ingredients, and take over the kitchen stove, kitchen counters, and the kitchen sink. (I clean up after myself when I cook, so can they :-).)

My son, who’s not as fond of this routine as his sister… 008
…tends to go for the more practical selections. Whatever can be thrown in one dish and cooked together is a first choice for him.

010215
My daughter, on the other hand, has to be scaled back now and then. Otherwise it’d be ten-course meals with drink pairings and a selection of desserts. This is what her table looks like on her nights:

052054053
And if we have guests, she completes the scene with a towel draped elegantly over her arm, serves and refills drinks individually, and personally makes rounds about the table to dish out seconds. Top Chef, thank you.

059285

Though cookbooks for kids have easy to make dishes, many of them include ingredients that aren’t always the healthiest. So I prefer recipes from sites such as allrecipes.com, or cookbooks such as Ree Drummond’s The Pioneer Woman Cooks: Recipes From an Accidental Country Girl. Here comes Mathias’ version of Ree’s braised beef brisket:

277

These nights are fun, but they’re not always easy. It takes longer for the twins to follow a recipe than it would if I were to cook. And the cleanup can sometimes take a military turn. But in the end, they’re learning to accept more responsibility as they get older, and I see them glow when they receive praise for a well-cooked meal.

And should we eat out on a Friday, the chef of the evening gets to choose the restaurant.

All-in-all, we enjoy this family tradition, as it gives additional meaning to the phrase, “Thank God it’s Friday!”

Your turn: What are some family activities or traditions you keep in your household?

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...

Thanks, Mom

09 Saturday May 2015

Posted by tanaramccauley in Faith, Relationships, and Other Topics

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

dance like no one is watching, family, gratitude, holiday, inspiration, love, Mom, Mother's Day, parenting, relationships, thanks, Zumba

I blog sporadically for Compassion Ministries, an organization that makes it possible for my family to sponsor three children from different countries.

In honor of Mother’s Day, this week’s Compassion blogging prompt is to write an open letter to my mom. I couldn’t turn down the opportunity to publicly praise her, despite her love for privacy.

So…

Dear Mom,

When it comes to how wonderful you are, I probably tell other people more than I tell you. That I love you is no secret. But what I love about you I rarely take the time to articulate.

I think you’re beautiful. You carry yourself with such grace and dignity it’s almost regal. And your taste in jewelry is adorable.

I’m amazed that you had us three girls back to back…

IMG_1328

…and finally the boy…

FullSizeRender

…yet you remained ever gentle and patient. And you were always there.

Breakfast. Lunch. Dinner. Snacks of fruit and veggies. Phone curfews and friend interviews. You cared enough to take the time.

Your “no” meant “no” and your “yes” meant “yes.”

I never liked those fish mackerel patties. But no one’s perfect. You are forgiven.

You were never afraid to sing off-key and dance with us, even if you didn’t know the latest moves.

(I was going to post the Zumba picture here, but I can’t have you killing me :-).)

Your smile is contagious…

momndad

…as is your sense of adventure.

IMG_8776

And while being your daughter is its own blessing, having you as the grandmother of my children is like honey straight from the comb. It takes a special grandma to help her granddaughter plant a watermelon, then turn around and mail it once it’s ripened.

watermelon

Your integrity and authenticity, your unwillingness to speak evil of anyone, your work ethic, your joy, your heart…

I love and admire you. We all do.2014-12-28-McCauleyMcCauleys-4

For all you’ve done, all you do, and who you are…

Thank you.

Happy Mother’s Day

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...

Soapbox Parenting

17 Friday Apr 2015

Posted by tanaramccauley in Faith, Relationships, and Other Topics

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Christian, communication, conversations, discussions, family, humor, life lessons, parenthood, parenting, preaching, raising children, relationships, soapbox, speech, The Incredibles

200147004-001“You sly dog! You caught me monologuing!” ~Syndrome, The Incredibles

Parenting has quite a few deja vu moments. You get the distinct feeling you’ve seen, done, or felt a particular something before.

Then it hits you.

The lecture, the kid with eyes glazed over, the adult droning on and on in an attempt to impale her listeners with life lessons. You have lived this scene. Only this time you’re the droner.

It happens to the best of us. A conversation about baking turns into an analogy for marriage. (Actually that was one of my finer moments. Performing a psalm on impulse that lasted forty verses and didn’t rhyme? My kids went to bed afraid we belonged to a cult.)

Children learn more from our actions than our words. We know this. It’s been proven. Still, we succumb to the urge to give doctoral dissertations worthy of official titles:

The Fundamentals of Sharing
Why Childhood Chores Ensure a Successful Adulthood
Choose Life: An Experiential Case Study Against Drug Use

We can’t help it. Our impassioned words warm their faces until their ears shrivel up and fold over on themselves. And though we walk away realizing we should’ve dropped the mic before the crowd turned restless, we also know we’ll probably do it again.

Because we love them.

That love sifts through events and conversations searching for teachable moments. Then off we go, portable stage erected, podium approached, throat cleared.

But not all hope is lost.

Because those young people we occasionally hold hostage via verbosity, they love us too.

And if we live what we say, and listen when they talk, and dwell with them–dig in and spend the time it takes to show them they’re where we want to be–they’re actually listening.

There’s more to parenting than five-point speeches. That doesn’t mean we should never speak. Our words have meaning. And with experience, we learn to use less of them.

The clever among us even switch it up a bit, making room on the box for a few corny jokes.

Your turn: How do you compensate for your parenting faux pas?

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...

Happy and Prosperous 2015!

08 Thursday Jan 2015

Posted by tanaramccauley in and Other Topics, Faith, Relationships, Writing and Pursuing Publication

≈ 11 Comments

Tags

Bible, Christ, Christian, christine caine, dinner, exercise, faith, family, fiction, fitness, goals, health, kay arthur, New Year, precepts, resolutions, romans, undaunted, writing

2014-12-28-McCauleyMcCauleys-202A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps. ~Proverbs 16:9

It’s the second week of the new year, and I hope you are still as excited about your goals and resolutions as you were at the beginning. I know I am.

2014 ended with the blessed commotion of travel, family, laughter, and lots of food. The new year started with a flu-like illness that put me out of commission for the better part of a week. At least now I don’t have to work off holiday pounds, just keep them off :-).

My goals for 2015 aren’t lofty, but they’re ambitious enough to stretch me and leave me a little daunted. Good thing I started the year with Christine Caine’s Undaunted: Daring to do what God calls you to do, a book I highly recommend.

Now I’m ready to excel in areas of faith, family, and of course fiction. While I’m currently doing more editing than writing at the moment, I am committed to finishing a third novel by September of this year. My biggest writing goal for this year is to acquire agent representation.

For my precious family, the goal is to continue to make time in our busy schedules to be present with each other. Cooking and reading together, as well as more dinners around the kitchen table, are just some of the ways we plan to stay connected.

A dear friend and I are committed to going even deeper with God this year, and are starting a Romans Bible study through Precept Ministries by Kay Arthur. The workbook looks intense, and I’m excited to get started.

Though fitness is a goal I added to my list with a grim scowl on my face (because I despise anything remotely resembling organized exercise), I am committed to exercising regularly this year. With three young children to take care of, I need to take care of myself, and that includes heart health from elevated heart rates, bone health from bearing weights, and yada-scowl-yada.

So that pretty much sums up my outlook for 2015 on a grand scale. I’ve got my plans broken down into doable chunks so that I don’t get overwhelmed by the lot of it. And I’m leaving room for the Lord to interrupt where He will, because at the end of each day it’s all about Him anyway.

So what about you? I’d love to hear what your plans are for this year, and how 2015 is going for you so far. Whatever this year holds, I pray it brings you closer to God and walking the path He designed specifically for you.

From my family to yours, Happy New Year!

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...

The Nearness of God

13 Saturday Dec 2014

Posted by tanaramccauley in and Other Topics, Faith, Relationships

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

broken hearted, Christ, Christian, Christmas, comfort, family, grief, healing, holidays, hurt, love, nearness of God, psalm, relationships, restoration

The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite spirit. -Psalm 34:18

nearness to God

This will be our first Christmas without my mother-in-law. For some it will be a first Christmas without a spouse, a sibling, a friend, or a child. For others it will be the second Christmas, or the third, maybe more.

Whatever your grief, know that God has not forgotten you. May His love surround you in such a way that you know without a doubt He is near.

Blessings and prayers from my family to yours.

~Tanara

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...

Twice the Miracle

09 Wednesday Apr 2014

Posted by tanaramccauley in Faith, Relationships, and Other Topics, Short Stories, Songs, and Poetry, Writing and Pursuing Publication

≈ 21 Comments

Tags

Bible, Christian, faith, family, miracles, parenting, pregnancy, premature birth, religion, submission, surrender, twins

nurse

I could tell by the look in the nurse’s eyes she wasn’t sure I understood what she was saying. We stared at each other, she with one brow lifted in question for some sign of comprehension on my end; me drifting inside myself with a host of “what if’s” tumbling through my mind.

My twins, due in two months, would be delivered in a matter of hours. The medical staff had done their best to keep them in, and now they had no choice but to take them out surgically.

In part I was relieved. My son, whose water had burst five days earlier, and whose heart stopped with every contraction, couldn’t possibly survive much longer. But the nurse wanted me to acknowledge the risks of such an early delivery: long-term disabilities, breathing difficulties, jaundice, stunted growth, brain defects…and very possibly death. My husband squeezed my hand and spoke for me. Yes we understood. Yes we were prepared.

But no…I wasn’t.

I remember feeling so cold that the blanket tucked around my swollen body was about as effective as it could’ve been warming a block of ice. A new mother, never having held one of my children, I wasn’t at all prepared for the worst. In truth I wanted nothing to do with it.

In my mind’s eye I saw my children alive and healthy, growing and happy. From the first toddled steps to the first days of school; then on to camping trips, family vacations, and game days. That’s what I was prepared for. My heart, which others wanted me to coax into being ready for anything, was defiantly unyielding in its loyalty to the original plan. Come what may, problems and all, I wanted those babies.

But soon enough, as with every other time when my will has rushed to the frontlines of battle and tossed it’s proud locks, words buried in my core began to whisper what I knew all along to be true. It wasn’t my choice. And no amount of will could change that. Whether either twin would suck that first breath of God’s given air into their lungs, or pass quietly on to the call of their Maker, was out of my hands.

I had to lay before Him the desire of my heart – that He let my babies live – then lay my will flat-faced on the floor in submission to His, and accept whatever He chose for me. And in all that still know that He loves me, He is for me, and He is now and forever will be my King. As soon as I did that I had peace about the entire situation, and was finally prepared in the way the doctors and nurses wanted me to be prepared.

What strange creatures we are! What is it in us that makes us automatically think when we’re willing to let go of something we desperately want, it means we’ve already lost it? For at that time, though I still had hope, and I knew beyond doubt that God could not only let them live but make them completely healthy, I was internally cringing in preparation for loss.

I look back on that now, nine years which seem to have passed as quickly as nine glorious sunsets, and I can imagine Him looking down at me on that rather hard, sterile rollaway. His eyes full of compassion as He listened to the fears suppressed beneath my brave exterior. He knew I would love Him no matter what – perhaps He just wanted me to know it too – then He blessed me with two completely healthy, beautiful babies.

SAMSUNG DIGITAL CAMERA

twinsbday

My twins – His twins – turned nine recently. And as they reminisce over the fun they had bringing in the “big nine,” I sit back and look at them in celebration. Not just celebration for their lives, but also celebration of the worthy, mighty Father who gave them life. He who did not spare His own Son, spared both my son and my daughter.

And He is now, and will forever be, my King.

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...

A Book Review of Shattered by Dani Pettrey

16 Saturday Mar 2013

Posted by tanaramccauley in Book Reviews

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

book review, Christian fiction, dani pettrey, faith, family, mystery, relationships, romantic suspense, shattered

Shattered

It isn’t everyday that Piper McKenna gets to see her youngest brother Reef. So when he shows up unexpected after several years absence, Piper’s initial reaction is one of joy. Then Reef returns the same night covered in the blood of someone newly murdered. Certain her brother is incapable of violence, Piper is willing to risk everything – including her life – to prove his innocence.

The evidence against Reef is staggering, causing those closest to him to doubt his character. Their doubt only fuels Piper’s determination, and soon she is chasing other leads across North American states and the Canadian border in hopes of uncovering enough information to set Reef free. In the process of playing detective, love begins to rear its head from the most unsuspected of collars, and Piper has to wonder if her quest will end with more questions than answers.

This second novel in Pettrey’s debut Alaskan Courage series is a romantic suspense of the highest caliber. The pacing is fast enough to keep you turning pages, but not so fast as to compromise the quality of character and plot development. Piper’s brother Gage is an atheist with a boyish personality who knows how to joke, but we’re allowed glimpses of the deeper side of him where hurt and bitterness reside. The victim, Karli, even though dead, comes to life as her past is uncovered and pieced together. The reader is given cause to laugh, reflect, and mourn; yet all the while suspicion, tension, and the threat of danger linger at the back of the mind.

The varying degrees of faith in the characters provide a realistic portrayal of the struggles believers and non-believers experience as they wrestle with the concepts of pain and injustice in a world created by a loving God. Shattered becomes a book that entertains, inspires, and stays with you days after the last words have been read. I gave it five out of five stars.

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...

Two Are Better…

31 Thursday Jan 2013

Posted by tanaramccauley in Faith, Relationships, and Other Topics

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Bible verses, children, Christian, collage, comfort, Ecclesiastes, encouragement, family, friends, frown, hugs, inspirational, love, mending, parenting, photos, pictures, quality time, relationships, restoration, siblings, sisters, smile, support, wipe away the tears

Tears are never as bleak when there is someone to wipe them away…

two_are_better

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...

Dancing on a Cloud…of Relationships

04 Friday Jan 2013

Posted by tanaramccauley in Writing and Pursuing Publication

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

amwriting, author, Christmas, dancing on a cloud, family, New Year, relationships, road trip, short stories, tea, travel, vacation, writer

dancingonacloud

Dancing on a Cloud. It’s not what I’m actually doing, just the name of the tea I’m drinking; and how I feel after spending a few weeks wrapping gifts, eating good food, reliving past times, and driving the open road.

roadtripping

And though I love being home in Arizona, there’s a certain euphoria to zipping my jacket all the way up because winter is actually cold; and a near manic joy to being able to stick my hand under the bed and look for a kid’s shoe without having to worry if a scorpion will finally get me.

But more than all of that, it’s just being with family. Being the middle sister in a set of three girls all a year apart, and big sister to the coolest, tallest little brother ever, I’m like a kid at Christmas–especially when it is Christmas–when we’re all together again. Add a grandma, a set of in-laws who are like extra parents, old friends, and some of the cutest kids on the planet, and you’ve got yourself one happy writer.

nieces

It got me to thinking about relationships and how they are pretty much the core of our lives the short time we live them. They are also the inspiration behind what we read, watch, and listen to. And because much of what I write deals with relationships between people–parents, spouses, strangers, friends, enemies, siblings, and the like–a short series on the topic seems like a great way to start the year.

So for the next few weeks I’ll be highlighting relationships in my posts. I’ll vary it up with some exposition, video, fictional short stories, and maybe a poem or two.

If something strikes a chord, or you have a relationship topic you’d like to see, by all means chime in! That way while we’re relationship exploring, we can get some relationship building going on at the same time.

Stay tuned, and Happy 2013!

 

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...
← Older posts

Recent Posts

  • AWOL Writer Captured!
  • Reclaimed
  • Unseen

Categories

  • Writing and Pursuing Publication
  • Short Stories, Songs, and Poetry
  • Book Reviews
  • Faith, Relationships, and Other Topics
  • Website

Facebook

Facebook

Twitter

  • Marked as to-read: Sisters of the Resistance by Christine Wells goodreads.com/review/show/37… 3 months ago
Follow @tanaramccauley

What I’m Reading

Instagram

No Instagram images were found.

Subscribe in a reader

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

American Christian Fiction Writers Association

Blog at WordPress.com.

Cancel

 
Loading Comments...
Comment
    ×
    <span>%d</span> bloggers like this: